Old Blogs

I know you are not supposed to compare your children or any children for that matter.  You still do of course no matter how hard you try not too.  I have been reading my old blogs from when Annabelle was an infant to see when she started to do things like talk, sign, stand on her own, etc.  Annabelle was about 10 months before she signed, Caroline has done it at 8.  Just once but still I was impressed (ha).  I thought Annabelle was talking by 8 months but looks like I was wrong.  She was closer to 10 so that gives Caroline another couple months to start speaking.  She babbles a lot of mostly she just laughs and screams (good screams not bad ones).  It is so weird to remember Annabelle didn't come out of the womb talking like I remember.  She has been talking forever and not just baby talk, big words and phrases and sentences.  Jason always told me we would not talk "baby talk" to our children and we haven't.  Annabelle was so stubborn she was 3 days past 1 year old before she walked.  I know she could have done it sooner.  Caroline is on her way to walking in the next couple of months but we will see.  She could start walking or she could not start until she is over a year old too.  No matter what they do you still love your children with all your heart because they are perfect.

<.3

I'm not a very good writer, but I hope I am able to get my point across without making myself sound like a very harsh person.  I consider myself to be nice, to be funny and to have a good personality but there are some things that I could be better at.  Those things I see in my children, that they are better than me already even at their young ages.  My husband is very different from me, he is very loving, very funny and has a good personality (well maybe we aren't that different) but it is "different."  His heart is very different, although I am loving he is loveable.  I'm not a cold person but when I think of myself and my husband these lyrics from The Avett Brothers song Shame always come into my mind "My heart was always fairly cold. Posing to be as warm as yours.  My way of getting in your world."  I have sympathy for people, I have empathy for people but there is just something about my heart and my husband's heart that is different.  I wasn't a lovey dovey child growing up, I didn't like hugs, kisses, public displays of affection, stuff like that.  What "normal" people probably enjoy.  I didn't say "I love you" often or at all actually.  I was just "weird!"  My Annabelle has the biggest heart at the age of 3.  I told her a couple weeks ago that I was so glad that she has her "daddy's heart."  She said, "But momma, I have your heart too."  I just smiled at her because she does have my heart too but mainly and probably most importantly she has the warm heart of her daddy. My lack of affection toward people was probably a little more than hurtful to my family and I am so glad that Annabelle is different from me. 

8 Months!

To my precious Caroline on your 8th month of life!

Today, on your 8th month birthday you signed "MORE" to momma!  Of course momma was excited and didn't give you more fast enough.  I am hoping you still got the connection.  You signed it so perfectly, like you had known how to do it your whole life!  Momma was cheering and clapping and so you got all excited and threw your hands in the hair with your eyes smiling as big as they could.  My girls have the most beautiful eyes, it's true.  I hear it from everyone so it's not just momma's opinion.  You are cruising EVERYWHERE.  We have to watch you constantly because you want to stand up on anything and everything that you can find no matter how tall it is.  I will be very surprised if you don't start walking within the next month.  You are brave and confident in your abilities so I think that will help.  I am so happy to have you and your sister.  You love her so much, you want to be able to do all the things she is doing.  I hope that this love you two share will continue into adulthood.  So many people it seems have no relationship with their siblings when it gets older and it is sad.  I think that the relationship me and daddy share will only positively influence your relationship with Annabelle but also with other people.  I am so happy to be a part of your life and to be the mother to both of you.  You are such a smiler, just like your sister.  How we got to be so blessed with two of the happiest children I have ever seen I will never know.  We love you so much!

Love
MOMMA!